Thursday, June 28, 2007

End of the Road

Who am I?
Who does Satan tell me I am?
Who does God tell me I am?
These are the questions that I, my co-leader, and our ten campers wrestled with throughout the course of last week. It was a hard week, but it was a week full of blessing. For me, it was hard to watch 10 15-year-olds come to terms with the idea that Satan wants them to believe all kinds of lies about themselves. It was hard asking them to be honest with themselves about who they think they truly are. But, it was incredible to be a witness as they realized that God loves them for who they are now! And, not only does God love them for who they are, He forgives them for what they've done; and He can wipe it all clean!
For me, though, last week was more than just watching these teenagers grow in the knowlege of God. I came to terms with a few things as well. Last Tuesday night, one of the camper groups was doing a skit about the things they had learned during the day. They mentioned a lady they had met at a nursing home during their service project. This lady was telling them that her husband had passed away not long ago, and she was now searching for her identity without him. As they continued telling this woman's story, I began to realize that that could have been me. Until about 6 months ago, if I had gotten married, it would have been difficult for me to separate my identity from that of my husband. I sat in that room in total awe of my Lord!
He has led me on a journey that was designed only for me. He led me into a painful wilderness knowing full well that I would emerge on the other side declaring Him my Prince Charming...claiming my true identity as His daughter and bride! The last several years (especially the last 10 months) have been purposefully scripted in order to teach me how to be in love with God before I fall in love with any man. He has also taught me about what my identity in Him looks like: what it looks like for Kristi Renee Lowery to be a daughter of the King. He has shown me how to cherish the gifts He has given me, and to be ready to use them in conjunction with the man He has for me instead of putting them aside for the sake of a relationship. What a mighty God I serve! He has been so patient with me as I have struggled and questioned His timing in my life. After last week, I emerged ready to say "the end" to this chapter of my life. This is the end of the road for that lesson. I will cling to Him as He continues to remind me His timing is best and His love is fulfilling. But, this journey is over! Praise the Lord for being faithful!!!! He has been good to me!
"Those who sow in tears
will reap with songs of joy.
He who goes out weeping,
carrying seed to sow,
will return with songs of joy,
carrying sheaves with him."
Ps. 126: 5-6